A New Chapter

Hey guys, so I’ve been meaning to write this post for a long time and it feels like it’s slightly lost relevance now… but then I guess maybe only to me because it doesn’t make a different to you. What I mean by this is I wanted to publish this the day of or the day after my 16th birthday – it’s many more days after my 16th birthday, but you only know that because I just told you. Anyway, the purpose of this post is to talk about what turning 16 has felt like to me and what I hope will change in my future.

So let’s start at the most basic yet most crucial and important part of being 16 – you’re legally an adult (or semi-adult) but you’re definitely somewhere in between being a child and being an adult. Personally, I see my childhood as being behind me now, simply because I feel like I am now allowed to do things that a ‘child’ simply wouldn’t be allowed to do – such as get a job, pay tax, get married (with parents permission – not that I plan on doing that any time soon), move out (?) all these things are not things that children would be allowed to do. For those purposes I feel very much like an adult, well, I don’t think anyone ever truly feels like an adult (correct me if I’m wrong) but I don’t feel like I could call myself a child or would wish to be called a child by others, it’s just the idea that the only thing I’ve ever known is now behind me. It’s now something to look back on, rather than to live in. I know it’s quite a blurred line between whether you’re really an adult or whether you’re still a child but I don’t think anyone calls 16-year-olds children. It’s so strange to me because when I was growing up, even from as young as five, I was desperate to grow up – to turn 16, learn to drive, be in a relationship, go on exciting adventures independently, get a job etc. and whilst I am still excited for all of these things I also wish more than anything that I was still a child. I don’t feel like I had enough of a childhood, there was so much more that I had left to do and experience as a child. I also don’t want to be grown up and have to accept responsibility for so many things, have to work all the time, worry about moving out and going to university, worry about getting a job, worry about all the adult things that they worry about. I want to still be in the quiet, relaxing world of being a child. Whilst I was a pretty independent child and I liked doing things by and for myself, I always knew my mum was on hand to assist me and nothing was too stressful. And whilst my mum is still here to give me a hand, she hasn’t kicked me right out on the streets the second I’ve turned 16 but there are things that I find a lot more stressful now.

When you’re younger, you see the future as this big exciting thing, as a child I often felt trapped – maybe trapped is the wrong word, it makes me sound like I had a miserable childhood – I actually had a pretty bloody fantastic one – but I felt like there was so much I envisioned doing when I could drive, I had all of my own money and could buy whatever I wanted whenever I wanted, I could wear high-heels and loads of make-up, I could meet up with friends by myself and whilst all of these are exciting there’s so much more that a child doesn’t realise. When you get older the future seems so much more real, if you understand what I mean, suddenly you realise that you don’t just get handed a job on a plate when you become an adult, you don’t get a car handed to you on a plate, you certainly don’t get grades and school/college offers handed to you on a plate. Suddenly you have to work really hard for all of this whilst also finding time to enjoy yourself, finding time for yourself every once in a while to relax. It’s amazing how something so unimaginable and exciting quickly becomes something terrifying and stressful. I’m not saying I’m not looking forward to the future – of course I am, but it hasn’t really lived up to my expectation of having a perfect life with loads of money instantly – but I’m pretty sure it never meets any child’s expectation. I feel like this post is really depressing and deep, I’m not saying I’m miserable or I wish I didn’t have the life I have, I’m simply saying your perspective changes as you get older and you shouldn’t wish your childhood away because you’re young, you have all the time in the world, use it wisely, get out and play with friends, go to the park and run around; don’t fantasise about being a big girl or boy and being able to drive cars and wear exciting shoes etc. because the time you have now is a very exciting time for you. Everything else will happen in it’s own time.

I honestly can’t remember what I did with my life a year and a half ago, it sounds absolutely insane but a year and a half ago I didn’t study, I didn’t work hard for the things that were really important, I didn’t properly have a life plan that was actually working, I probably did basically nothing and now I hardly ever get a chance to sit down and do something relaxing, it’s like I wake up, get up, study, study, study, eat, study some more, eat, get dressed, sleep and in amongst all that attend all my activities/commitments. That’s my life. Every week. I wouldn’t have it any other way but I just can’t remember what I did with my life a year and a half ago but that’s partly my point, when you’re young it doesn’t matter if you remember what you did yesterday or the day before, it doesn’t matter if you didn’t do anything ‘meaningful’ or ‘productive’ because you’re a child. You don’t have a stress or care in the world. Then suddenly exams are around the corner and it’s all you think about and it’s all you do. I absolutely love my life though, and if someone knocked on my door tomorrow or in five minutes time and offered me a different one or said I could change something about mine I honestly think I would tell them they were in the wrong place. I appreciate everything I have so much and although the long hard days of studying are stressful and hard, they’ll pay off in the long run – or even the short run and everything will suddenly become worth it. I am hugely excited for the future and everything that is to come, but right now I’m just going to live in the moment and enjoy what I currently have – because who knows, maybe some day it won’t be here.

I really hope you enjoyed this post! Please feel free to share your turning-16 story in the comments below – I love reading all the feedback I get. Make sure to like this post if you did enjoy it and follow me if you aren’t already for more post like this!

If you wish to contact me you can do so using my e-mail address: aninspiredteen@gmail.com

That’s all for now!

Inspired Teen 🙂

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