Hey guys, hope you’re all okay! I lost a follower today… maybe it’s someone trying to tell me how rubbish my Blogmas is! Haha! Sorry, whoever it was, if I insulted you in some way or if my blog became so boring you had to unfollow me! I don’t hold it against you!
Anyway, I’ve been doing some studying today which has been nice and refreshing as I’m very far behind, I’m trying to reach a specific checkpoint by the end of tomorrow so I can relax a bit over the holidays rather than stressing about exams and studying. Let’s see if I actually get the work done.
Today’s post is going to be about who you should get gifts for, the reason for this is because last year I got a bit carried away and bought a lot of people presents, people I don’t even speak to anymore and I found myself thinking this year what a waste it was, I guess I was trying to buy friends kind of, I thought that if I bought them a present they would see that I cared about them and wanted to be friends with them, but you can’t buy friends in that way and if you can they won’t really be your friends. So, basically, I decided to enlighten you with this post so you don’t make the same mistakes I did.
I’m going to start by saying, don’t get anyone a gift if you don’t want to. I know this might sound a bit harsh and you’re probably thinking, “but I have to get that certain family member a present because otherwise they’ll be annoyed.”, but you really don’t have to. You’re not obligated to buy anyone a present. If it’s a particularly difficult person, like a disapproving aunt or a grumpy gran then just say you didn’t have the money, if they don’t understand then that’s their problem. Then you’ve saved the money and not hurt their feelings. You should only buy presents for people you care about and truly want to be in your life and who make the effort to be in yours. I’ve realised thoughout the years – and specifically this year, but you can read more about that at the end of December – that some people really aren’t worth your time and it’s not worth putting in the effort. It doesn’t matter how many texts you send them, how many converations you try to have, how many presents you buy them, they’re not going to change. If they can’t treat you like you’re worth their time then they don’t deserve that from you. Friendships and relationships don’t work unless both parties are putting effort in. It’s pretty miserable being in a one person friendship. By all means give them a card, a card is a simple thing, I give basically everybody cards, but a present is much more than that; or I see it that way. A present is not only a nice thing to give to someone but it’s a sign of caring and effort. It shows you that they like having you in their lives and they appreciate you. Obviously if there’s someone important in your life and they can’t afford to get you a present or you them then that’s different, it will be understood that they don’t have any money.
If you’re worrying about buying presents for people who don’t make any effort to be in your life they’re really not worth the money or effort. Maybe not getting them a present will make them realise how you feel and how un-active they’ve been in your life this year. It’s hard to deal with because you know that you could upset them by not getting them a present, and being a nice person you obviously don’t want to upset anyone but if they’ve upset you or completely ignored you this year are they really worth it? I’m not saying be horrible to someone, I would never suggest being horrible to someone, you always have to keep the moral high ground and be nice to them, but not buying someone a present does not make you a bad person. Also, the less money you spend on undeserving people the more money you have to spend on the people that truly matter to you, the people who have truly put the effort in throughout the year. The way I see it, presents have to be earned. This may sound a bit harsh, but people don’t get to treat you like nothing and then expect a present from you. That’s not how society works, or it shouldn’t be.
I love to buy presents, I love the excitement of wrapping presents up for your friends and family, the anticipation of them opening the presents, the smiles on their faces etc. but only for deserving people. I know I’m basically parroting the same thing over and over again but it took me a long time to realise what I have now realised. You just don’t get the same kind of enjoyment out of giving someone who doesn’t really appreciate your effort a present, so why worry yourself? The worse thing is when you get someone a present and all they really do is scowl at you and say thank you.
If you’re getting someone a present who hasn’t been the nicest of late, or you’ve had quite a few arguments with them throughout the year then I’m not saying don’t get them a present, in some cases this is the ideal time to show them you still care, some people struggle to proper get to grips with the fact that people like them, that people care enough to hang out with them and sometimes they behave badly and can’t really except any fault for it and it’s really frustrating and upsetting, but inside they feel guilty about it, for longer than you might realise, but you still love them, get them a present and tell them that you still care. Obviously presents aren’t the only thing that show someone you care but don’t not get a present for them this year simply because you’re not on good terms at this specific moment, I’m only saying not to get presents for if you really don’t want to, if you feel like they’re undeserving, if you feel that way then it’s probably because it’s true.
At the end of the day, it’s your money and you can do what you want with it, but money is a precious thing no matter how much of it you have and wasting it on people that aren’t worth it is just a waste, there are so many things money can do and giving a present to someone who hasn’t been nice to you or has completely ignored is really not worth the money. I’m not telling you, you shouldn’t and maybe getting them a present will change their ways, but it’s also possible that not getting them a present will make them change their ways. Basically, what I’m saying is; it’s your choice but don’t feel forced or pressured into buying or doing something you don’t want to simply because of how others might view you.
I hope this post was useful to you! If it was please give it a like and follow me if you aren’t already for more posts throughout Blogmas and the new year!
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Inspired Teen 🙂